Practicing sign language

Well it finally happened. My kids witnessed me cursing and waving random finger gestures in our van to some under medicated cyclist coming home today. I was not in a bad mood so I can't blame it on that because USUALLY I am a very calm and cool driver...not the swearing/middle finger waving type. So I don't know WHAT made me go to the dark side but happily I went, pitch fork in hand ready for battle.

We were coming home from the inlaws who had the kids all this morning (LOVING the inlaws!) and I was taking our usual route when I saw a group of bikers on my right. I kept on driving carefully to pass them when all of a sudden, "JOE under medicated biker" pulls away from the pack right in front of ME and in my lane more importantly!! I slam on the breaks and remember quickly where the horn is situated. I lay on the horn baby...crap I have a LANE here and have the right away as well! So mister cyclist turns around and I get a look at his face. That told me everything I needed to know before heading into battle. This guy thought he was Maximus in Gladiator but was not nearly as cute as Russell. His face was full of rage and scrunched up his lips and mouthed "f___ you!" while giving me the single digit salute. Maybe on another day I would have looked away and just drove by or maybe gave him a disapproving look but not today. I was PISSED that this guy thought he could tell ME off for driving in my freaking lane!! So I was ready. Right hand assumed the position and it flung up from my steering wheel in a blaze of glory. I had my speech down as well......short and sweet and repeating his statement with the same scrunched up face. I quickly drove by him triumphantly and down the hill to the awaiting yellow light. The same word I had just used came to mind. I quickly decide to turn right and take a detour home because I ain't dealing with psycho infront of my kids...hand gestures were the extent of the convo I wanted.

After my get away I keep looking in my rear view to make sure I got away clean. I hear from the backseat "Mommy, why did you wave your hand at that man?"

Just being friendly G.... (quick thinking Mom!!)

I had to phone my husband then and vent my encounter to him in the hopes that he would fly over in the squad car and arrest this creep on site and maybe rough him up a bit. No such luck. Darn.